Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Short People Got No Reason...

One of the things I love about blogs is that you get the chance to say that response that came to you three hours after the conversation ended.

Earlier today I posted a Facebook status that I want to clarify. So please join me at this intersection of social media as I respond to my Facebook posting comments via blog post.

First off, I do not read Marie Claire. Never did.

I was a Glamour girl.

But I do follow a lot of Twitter accounts that cover the gamut from the intellectual to the kind that tweet live updates of an entire episode of Project Runway.

I subscribe to this melange of information not because of some higher purpose but because I might miss something.

I might miss some nugget that will help me understand stuff other people already know. Seriously. Not kidding.

I might miss something amusing to share at the next cocktail party to help alleviate my painful small-talk phobia.

I might miss something that makes me interesting.

When the love of my life and I were long distance dating on opposite coasts for three years, I became accustomed to storing up morsels of information and stories to share -- kind of like a squirrel preparing for winter.

I find myself still doing that - delighting in the "find" of a special interest piece in the NYT or a blog on the web. Storing it away until I can share it with him.

Despite the fact that he is a mere twelve inches away.

Occasionally, I stumble across a gem of no reasonable interest to me. Does not impact me. Does not even remotely concern me.

But my blood starts boiling. My righteous indignation starts marching around and wagging its finger. And my brain and mouth collaborate on a sputtering, passionate discourse to which the beleaguered love of my life is the audience of one. Until I get a second crack at it after entrapping sis on the phone.

I have a bit of history with this and I have been known to actually act on my disgust.

I started this blog as a rant against a blogger who called Christina Hendrick's fat.

In high school I saw a Macy's ad on a bus for tween girl jeans that was so provocative I wanted to throw myself at the bus to cover it up. Instead, I launched a personal boycott of Macy's -- sitting defiantly on a bench outside the store glowering at my mother as she skulked in to purchase her Clarins. I am proud to say that my boycott lasted through college -- can I help it that Macy's is now a two block away lunchtime errand?!

Then there was the innocuous Washington Post article I read in college detailing the arrest of some middle aged mother arrested for growing marijuana. It was all well and good until the last line of the article asking really, what was the harm in what she was doing?

Oh boy.

My future law school student self whipped out a nice little retort editorial that went along the lines of -- SHE WAS BREAKING THE LAW.

Well, it was published and there was that awkward moment when a "young, not yet engaged to me, charmed by my footloose and accepting self" love of my life googled my name and found the editorial.

So.

Anyhoo.

My point and bless you all for hanging in there - my point is - I get mad about stuff that no one else might think is important.

But it just may be important to somebody and it may make a difference to them that someone else understands.

This is what I learned today from a 140 character tweet ---

* There is a show on tv called Mike & Molly.

* The characters are overweight.

* Marie Claire paid for and posted on the magazine's website, a blog post in which the author stated among other things that she was grossed out by watching an overweight person cross the room much less watch two overweight tv characters fall in love and all that entails.

* No one on the whole of Marie Claire's editorial staff found this to be offensive.

Okay, so I did a little digging past the 140 characters.

I know Marie Claire is not the gold standard for living. But I also know that despite ourselves we read Marie Claire and like-minded magazines.

Instead of wasting trees to write in to the Dear Editor section that the cover picture of Megan Fox had a lot of interesting tattoos, readers should write in that the magazine can keep right ahead with the unrealistic dating advice and the crappy clothes that no one can actually wear day to night and the impossible to replicate beauty how to's - but for the love of all that is good and won't melt in your mouth -- give it a rest.

Most healthy women are NOT a size two and are sexy, smart, successful and every other exceptional alliteration.

So no, I no longer read the Marie Claire type of magazine. But I work with young women who do. I have extended family members who do. I don't need to read it - but I am glad I found out what it says so that I can write my 140 characters, status update, blog post editorial that says -- hey, this is drivel. Move along. Nothing to see here.

Be sure to read a lot of other things too.

You don't want to miss anything.